Sunday, May 29, 2011

78 degress and it's day 633!


I am awake and I already made the bed, fed the dog and picked up a bit. I am going to meet a friend for lunch downtown and then going to my meeting to do service. I worked 15 hours yesterday and it was worth it. I think eventually I might take Friday nights off from work. I will switch it to another night maybe? I am meeting my friend at a vegan/raw restaurant because she is "mostly doing raw now so that's what's best." This chick is always doing healthy type shit but she drinks and smokes - it cracks me up. This coffee I'm drinking is amazing. I honestly can't tell you - well I guess I can and I will - how fucking amazing those guys not being here is. I don't even mind the music coming from the building across the way. I have my bedroom door open and the windows open - it's heaven. I feel such a weight lifted off of me. I'm not taking Friday nights off until I move. This month is my last payment on one bill and by September I will be done paying off my friend. I am amazed at the difference of how I feel with them gone. Waking up today like this is like actually waking up. Not waking up, hiding, listening for weirdness, having to prepare myself to be walked in on or some craziness. No one woke me up banging things. Okay so I want to move. Great. Scary. Save money. Be a grown-up and look for opportunities. I could move outside of the city. One of the boroughs? I will look for inspiration. I am going to walk the dog. Ooooo I want to see what I was like on this day last year. Hold on. Well okay - I was crazy. I think I might like my writing better? Ugh - okay - holy shit. Sloooow down there girlie. Okay - I'm sober right now and I have cleaned up my life even more. Okay time to go on with this gorgeous day I was lucky enough to wake up to. I want my own apartment now where I can cook and have men over and LIVE and wake up. Yes. Okay cool and awesome. I love you Blueberry!!! Happy almost Memorial Day!! P.S. I just realized for what I went through and for how long it took me to really realize my problem - I'm doing okay. I'm in a good place. When have I ever said that before??? :):):)

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