I amseriously bored out of my fucking mind.

I'm here st the boutique and I seriously had to walk through torrential downpour to get here. It was raining like crazy and the whole time I was like "SEE I SHOULD HAVE SAID NO - NO I CA NOT WORK." Ugh - do you know what else? Larni called me because our mutual friend is opening a comedy club tomorrow night and he asked me if I would waitress. Are you fucking kidding me? When I was first listening to the message I thought he was going to ask me to perform but instead he asked me TO FUCKING BE THEIR WAITRESS!! He offered no money AND said be there at 7:30 like I would just jump right on that shit no problem. How fucking rude is that anyway? Not to mention it's last minute AND - ugh - fuck. Here is the thing - I am so fucking victimy and I also can NOT say no so I so mad he asked me anyway. I feel like I should still say yes and that is the last thing I want to do. He didn't even ask me if it was okay - like just assumed I would want to do that. Fucking a. I have a lot of work to do and it has to d with saying no and that it's okay to say no. Today Her Lady Wonder said to me that God is in the pauses and that it's good to say no. I think I always thought it was not spiritual to say no - but now I realize it is very, VERY spiritual. Now of course it's not raining anymore. I was slipping and sliding all over the place trying to get here and I was PISSED - so fucking annoyed. Okay - I have to learn to say no - She said my default should just be no - just say no. Or at least say let me think about it - let me figure it out. I had a healthy lunch at least. I have to go - slow learning. I'm so mad because I wanted to go to my regular meeting. Jeez.