Wednesday, December 11, 2013
I just emotionally ate the rest of my stew.
I'm not even kidding. Holy shitballs the owner of the store - have I ever given her a name - she needs a name - what rhymes with saber tooth? Saber Poof? Satin Goof? Batshit Roof? She's got these teeth that she talks out of the side - oh dear GOD - any fucking way - she came into the store twice today and the second time she came in she got really mad at me and made me cry. Somehow I managed to not destroy anything or quit or send her a message - or any of the other things I wanted to do. I went to a meeting and shared about it but didn't really feel better but here's where this lame ass story of me being a victim of some nut bag cunt on the upper east side (again) actually gets interesting. I called my sponsor and she talked me through doing this 4th step on her where at the end of it - I change my mind about my story in my head that always happens. WHAT? How confusing is that sentence? So I always think I'm a victim of the nut bag cunt - right? But I'm not - this is how she is and I don't have to work there and I don't have to put a title on myself because of her. I can move on and grow and me taking a shit on the floor and then dropping the keys off to her doorman with a note that says "GO FUCK YOURSELF" will only hurt me. Am I making any sense? Probably not but I feel so much better after working with my sponsor so that's great. I feel like I have a different perception on what happened and that's what I really need in my brain - a different perception. UGH - I'm SO DONE being a victim - seriously. I just ate 2 huge bowls of beef stew and I feel so gross. Or full - I just feel full. I'm going to shove an ice cream cone on top. What's her name? Cunt Bag? Can I just call her that? That's not very creative. Lawy Torn. What? No. Tawry Loon. Tawry Loon. Her name is Tawry Loon. Tawnie Loon for short. Tawnie Looner. Haha - that is making me laugh. Tawnie Looner. I'm going to practice doing an impression of her. RIGHT NOW BYE.