Wednesday, December 11, 2013

I just emotionally ate the rest of my stew.

I'm not even kidding.  Holy shitballs the owner of the store - have I ever given her a name - she needs a name - what rhymes with saber tooth?  Saber Poof?  Satin Goof?  Batshit Roof?  She's got these teeth that she talks out of the side - oh dear GOD - any fucking way - she came into the store twice today and the second time she came in she got really mad at me and made me cry.  Somehow I managed to not destroy anything or quit or send her a message - or any of the other things I wanted to do.  I went to a meeting and shared about it but didn't really feel better but here's where this lame ass story of me being a victim of some nut bag cunt on the upper east side (again) actually gets interesting.  I called my sponsor and she talked me through doing this 4th step on her where at the end of it - I change my mind about my story in my head that always happens.  WHAT?  How confusing is that sentence?  So I always think I'm a victim of the nut bag cunt - right?  But I'm not - this is how she is and I don't have to work there and I don't have to put a title on myself because of her.  I can move on and grow and me taking a shit on the floor and then dropping the keys off to her doorman with a note that says "GO FUCK YOURSELF" will only hurt me.  Am I making any sense?  Probably not but I feel so much better after working with my sponsor so that's great.  I feel like I have a different perception on what happened and that's what I really need in my brain - a different perception.  UGH - I'm SO DONE being a victim - seriously.  I just ate 2 huge bowls of beef stew and I feel so gross.  Or full - I just feel full.  I'm going to shove an ice cream cone on top.  What's her name?  Cunt Bag?  Can I just call her that?  That's not very creative.  Lawy Torn.  What?  No.  Tawry Loon.  Tawry Loon.  Her name is Tawry Loon.  Tawnie Loon for short.  Tawnie Looner.  Haha - that is making me laugh.  Tawnie Looner.  I'm going to practice doing an impression of her.  RIGHT NOW BYE.

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