Monday, December 16, 2013
Did I even spell that correctly? Lord have mercy - my life is unmanageable. The first step for drunks is - 1. Came to believe that we are powerless over alcohol - that our lives had become unmanageable. Is that the first step - OMG - I don't even know. Okay - yes - that's it. Whew - okay. Who says whew - I don't know I guess I do. I just don't know how to keep it all straight and listen - it's just me. I'm so confused keeping acting, comedy (what little of it there is), my laundry, food - blah, 2 jobs straight. I don't even know what is happening. Okay - this is where I am going to turn to the 4 agreements. Always do your best. I am at this moment going to do my best and today - today I did my best. I woke up, prayed & meditated, worked - SHOWERED - I KEEP TAKING SHOWERS AMAZING, got some groceries and flowers, went to the meeting around the corner from my house, returned 2 phone calls, heated up my newest crockpot mediocre dish and talked to my sponsor. Now I just need to clean a little bit - that's all - just give myself 45 minutes - I can do it - right? Go to work tomorrow at another job - oh my fucking JOB. That's what I'm going to start saying instead of oh my God. OMJ. Oh my Job. OMJ. I'm never going to remember this - ugh - byeeeee Bluebie I love you.