I wrote tonight.

I planned to write for one hour but I wrote for about 20 minutes before I got distracted by the very important Facebook. It makes me feel like barfing. Not really - what it makes me feel like doing is eating the rest of this chicken rice bowl and then crawling into bed. In the not good way. I'm very tired and I'm upset. This is not coming easily to me and I'm scared. And do you know what the craziest part is?? I haven't even performed yet. I'm making to much of this. I started to write today - from today. I started down a different path and I even have a different keyboard. It's going to take time. I need to calm down and keep taking care of myself AND keep writing. That's all - everyday. It will be okay. I don't want to do anything else - I don't know why. I want to have sex and I want to have a boyfriend but (I avoided the baby thing) well - I feel this. That's all their is to it. I just have to do this right now. What? I don't know. I'm so tired. I'm tired and scared and worse I'm apathetic. Something has to shift and change. I'm eating that chicken rice bowl. I'm not bloated enough!!! i can be more bloated!! This keyboard is so weird. There were warnings of severe injury and death all over the pamphlets for the mouse and this keyboard. WARNING IF MISUSED SEVERE INJURY OR DEATH CAN OCCUR WHILE USING THIS PRODUCT. Hahahhahaaaaa - now that's funny.....