Just became a vegetarian again.

Got home - the mouse in the trap was only half in it - its back legs and I had no fucking idea what to do - I HAD to put it out of its misery - holy fuck.  I put it in plastic bags and smashed it over the head with a hammer.  I'm not even kidding you.  It took me 10 minutes and like 20 tries - it was fucking horrible.  Part of me was worried I was going to like it - like those freaks on The Walking Dead.  Um - I am 41 fucking years old - I think I would know by now if not only I WANTED to murder but that I like it.  Seriously - I was freaked out that I would get a taste for murder by putting this poor adorable mouse out of its misery and start killing people?  Um - are you fucking kidding me?  It's not like I TRAPPED the mouse and tortured it - okay - I'm so fucking grossed out, sad and that was gross.  I can never eat fucking meat again and I never would if I had to kill it - I never would!!  WHY DO MICE HAVE TO BE SO CUTE?????  Oh my GOD - what the fuck I'm a mouse killer.  I almost set if free and then I just imagined 50 mice shitting all over my apartment and then I smashed it over the head.  Fucking horrible.  I feel terrible.  SO cute - it was SO CUTE.  I said sorry like 50 times - like that helps.  Okay - so wow - who the fuck am I now?  A fucking serial mouse killer.  I am a fucking serial mouse killer.  Maybe now I will get the balls to figure out how to seal this place up once they are all gone - I'm not doing this shit again - no fucking way.  Jeez.  Bye.  I'm sorry.