Saturday, August 18, 2012

2 things.

The first - mind blowing.  I looked into my oven the other day to see what was in there and in the hopes of beginning to use it.  I felt looking inside was a good beginning.  I saw a big frying pan and a cookie drying rack and I pulled out the frying pan and in amazement realized it matched my other frying pans.  Red, non-stick pans.  I freaaaaked out at the serendipity of this and put it back in and thought to myself and said it out loud for that matter "I can't believe this - that is so weird - I can't even take it in."  I mean the events that had to take place that the people before me forgot their pan - that they bought the same kind - that that's how much I was SO MEANT to live in this apartment???  I mean - I couldn't even think about it - deal with it.  The pressure of the amazing things I must be meant to do in this apartment were over-whelming.  I put it back in the oven and decided to think about it more when I was actually going to use the oven.  Soooo for days I still haven't used the oven and for some reason tonight on the train ride home I was thinking about the frying pan and then I remembered that when I moved in and unpacked those frying pans that were in storage for 5 !/2 years I had 3 of them......then I thought - well where is that third one????  then I remembered that I couldn't fit the biggest one in the cupboard above the stove because it was so big so I put it in  THE OVEN.  WOW.  So that was not such a serendipitous occurrence.  I merely forgot that I put the fucking frying pan in the oven.  Jesus.
The second thing - so scary.  I get home from running errands and I come upon my street with lots of people - way too many people standing around and what looks like a bomb exploded out of the building where the grandpa and those cute little girls always are.  I see that the apartment is black and it looks again - like a bomb exploded out of it.  I ask what happens - someone tells me it was a fire and I look for the little girl and see her with a man and she is holding her puppy.  I ask if she's okay and she's crying and then I ask where her grandfather is and the man holding her says - he's okay - he's right there.  He says she was playing with something and somehow a fire started.  It was so fucking scary - but no one was hurt but their apartment was.  I went inside and unpacked my stuff - made phone calls and on my way to the grocery store asked if they needed anything and there was like 7 of them sitting on lawn chairs outside their building.  I realized tha there were sooo many people living in that little apartment - holy shit.  So I went to the grocery store and bought them water and snacks.  I went back and gave it to them and the lady - who I don't even know was so grateful and I had to walk away because I started to cry.  Holy fuck I'm crying right now.  It's so scary.  Everyone in that building had to leave - all the animals and people - all 6 floors.  I wasn't even gone that long at all.  I left at five and got back at 9:ish I guess?  The little girl this morning told me that I could get a free helmet at the farmer's market.  I am so glad they are okay.  I hope they have insurance.  I need a fire extinguisher.
3rd thing - appreciate life.  Bye Blueberry - I LOVE you.
p.s.  The most horrible part?  The smoke smelled so good that I went and got real hot dogs (not those disguting turkey super healthy revolting hot dogs) and made myself a hot dog.  Unbelievable.

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