Whoooaaaa

right after I wrote that last post I spilled coffee all over my computer and the screen turned to stripes. what a crazy awful thing. I brought it to see if it could get fixed and I think it can be. So that is fantastic - I just have to bring him the screen to make sure that is okay. It has been so strange not to write on her - I have missed it so much. I seriously - what? I'm at the boutique so I am distracted. She never paid me until Friday so I still haven't gotten paid. He is itching at the bit for his rent money. Which he should be except for the fact that his boyfriend lives there for free and has his cousin there right now. So his boyfriend lives there for free and his boyfriend's cousin is there. What the fuck - it's none of my business. I should pay my rent on time no matter what. I can never plan again around her paying me. That much is very clear. The whole thing is making me sick to my stomach but okay - it will be okay. I have no right to be upset about who he wants to live or stay for free in his house. I can't wait to get out of here and go for a walk. I got a manicure/pedicure yesterday and she massaged my feet/ legs AND back and I LIKED all of it. Go figure. I'm healing. I would have never even a year ago been able to stand that. I also walked a long way to find a place that wasn't so expensive. It seems to be cheaper during the week. SO note to self - go during the week. This is such a boring post. I took such good care of myself yesterday. Better and better all the time. I found myself attracted to the most beautiful man - super sexy - I mean smoking hoooot. Turns out - gay. Jeeez. And bald. Gay and bald and I fantasized about him for 12 hours. Now I'm just confused. Hahahaaa ohh and big sigh. He looked at me funny when I left the meeting yesterday. I thought he was conflicted about his strong feelings towards me - turns out he was probably confused by MY strong feelings towards him. I have to peeeeee. Bye Blueb!!!