Tuesday, October 15, 2013

Horrible Dreams.

I went to bed early last night - like 9:30 - I don't think I've done that since I was 11.  I had such a bad nightmare it woke me up.  I dreamed I lived on this Island in this beautiful house that had been recently renovated.  As I walked around and admired the work done and the light from the windows I thought to myself "Oh I always have these dreams where I forget how beautiful the house is." - right?  Then I go outside and suddenly a bald man with tattoos is trying to get me - right?  I say to him "What do you want?"  He keeps trying to get me - then I get farther away and I'm all over this Island and then it's a lot of men trying to get me - bad men.  Then I decide to call 911 and they rdirect my call.  I finally get someone and they are giving me a hard time on the phone - like someone isn't really trying to get me.  Then right before I woke up - I had like an overlapping dream of the man getting me and keeping me captive somehow and even though he wasn't trying to have sex with me I decide I might as well have sex with him - somehow this will help.  Which he isn't into.  At he same time I'm still being chased and ignored by 911.  Then I woke up and it was almost 3:00 in the morning.  So I looked it up in the dream dictionary and it says people often have these dreams - next time it happens - ask what they want and tell them to go away.  I took some advil, meditated, and went back to sleep.  This time I dream that I get this really "nice" boyfriend who seems like he really loves me but he creeps me out - although I'm in denial about it.  Everyone is saying how lucky I am but I feel gross - I can't explain why - I just know something isn't right.  Then I go to my apartment and his friend shows up - locks the door on me and says "Wait here - he's coming with the girl" and he gets these ropes out.  Then I say to myself "no way - uh uh (I'm naked by the way) and while he is looking away for 2 seconds I unlatch the door and I get the fuck out of there and go next door - or outside - some big open space with a bunch of well dressed beautiful women/possible prostitutes.  I say to them (as I walk in naked covering up my pubic hair and my boobs) "This man is trying to hurt me next door and my boyfriend is coming with some girl too to do some weird shit - I need help."  Then this gorgeous, amazingly dressed hooker woman gets up and starts walking towards the door and says  "Oh - I will have sex with him - I haven't been working all day - I'll take care of it."  I explain that they are bad - they don't want to just have sex - they want to kill us and they have some poor girl that they are bringing and we need to get them.  Then she stops in her tracks and she's like "Ohhh" - and all the hooker chicks are like "ohhhh" and then we devise a plan to KICK THEIR ASSES and get them and save the girl.  Then I woke up again.  I was so proud of my self for not being a total victim the second dream around.  I am having a rough time.  My subconscious is going crazy.  Oh well - I just listened to a phone meeting and now I'm going to make some phone calls.  I can't drink - I can never drink and the only way that will happen is if I use the tools of the program. 

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