I'm amazed and a little freaked out

by how much time goes in to me taking care of myself. It has taken me all night to do what I wanted to accomplish which is clean a bit, deep condition my hair, put a mud mask on, do laundry and do my toes. I also watched 2 movies, had food, washed my shirt, put also ponds cold cream on my face and I checked facebook 37 times. No - I didn't just 15 times. I also walked the dog twice and drank a ton of water and detox tea. But I feel like I don't do enough and okay here's the thing....Self care takes SO much time. Holy crap taking care of yourself is SO much work and in a week I will need to clean and do all of this again. I feel so much better when my room and clothes and me are clean. Really clean. Oh I also cleaned the toilet and put liquid plumber down the shower drain. And last night I picked up and cleaned the mirror and the sink in the bathroom. Oh I also cleaned the coffee pot and soaked the inside parts in vinegar. Christ almighty I feel like I'm never going to get to the fun part where I get to be onstage again. Or where at least I'm not just writing on here about all that I've cleaned and washed. And guess what I'm SO LUCKY to have a washer and dryer right here and my own bathroom to clean!!! And I love to clean - I just - I don't know - it takes so much time and so much vigilance and how am I going to do all this all the time plus meditate and somehow let my art grow?? I have no idea. Okay - what?? Maybe I'm just shocked at how little I was doing all this before and how - disgusting I was living. Well okay - I'm relearning to live and apparently I like to spend time taking care of myself and I'm just surprised at HOW much time it takes - that's all. That's really the thing. But I'm SO GRATEFUL because I feel so much better like this. Okay - I'm going to rinse out my hair and rinse of this mud mask and try to sleep. It's 3:30 a.m. In one hour my sister will be waking up. Lots of productive, amazing people will be waking up. Hopefully by then I will be asleep. I love you blog - thank you for being here and listening to my riveting stories about laundry and mud masks.