Thursday, February 20, 2014

Okaaayaaaa - YEAH.

I'm good and batshit crazy!!!  HOOORRAAAYYY!!!  Okay - seriously - not that crazy - just fretted up.  I'm anxious and I've been weaning myself off of sugar and bread - so.  So I'm a little off - although I just ate turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing and corn - so - that's not really not eating sugar.  Holy fuck nuts.  It's so nice out today so that's good - the store was busy this morning and I sold some things.  The guy called me - we are going out again tonight and that will be nice - he's nice - we have a lot of similar interests - except his wife - I'm not interested in his wife.  He's not either but EEEE OOOOOOOOO.  I think I need to go for a walk.  Do you know what I did yesterday?  NO??  I WILL TELL YOU!!!  I worked at the store, walked to Alvin Ailey and took a dance class, walked to my friend and wrote with her (really we just gossiped about ourselves), walked to a studio - had one of the worst rehearsals of my LIFE and then went home.  This kid I have been working with in class is so difficult it's unreal.  It just kicks up all my alanon stuff AND I also feel responsible because he creeps me out SO MUCH and I feel like he must pick up on it.  But you know what???  When you stare at someone's crotch while you are rehearsing and they (they meaning ME) get creeped out - IT'S GOOD to pick up on that.  I'm reading The Road Less Traveled again and he says near the beginning of the book that neurosis (maybe Jung said this and he was quoting him) is an avoidance of real pain.  So I think I just emotionally ate turkey and am being neurotic about this kid because I am so fucking uncomfortable.  I think I'm going to make some phone calls so I am not thinking about myself anymore.  IS IT POSSIBLE?  Maybe - supposedly anything is.  Love you Bluebie bye.

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