Oh Sunday

oh. I am so tired - I really am. Work was so hard last night and not very busy. And creepy pants didn't seat me well so I didn't make very much money. Okay - in reality I made enough money but for how hard it was - and for the fact that he manipulates it - it just ENRAGES me. Plus he's - just - gross. I don't know what to do except talk to my therapist about it and I guess I will go to my manager who won't do anything about it. This is what bothers me the MOST about it - eventually he is going to do more and more and MORE shady things. He manipulates and is dishonest and - he fucks with my money. I can't stand it and I can't stand that he takes advantage the way he does. I was hoping I would wake up today and come up with some kind of solution - or at least not be as upset. But of course Cretona woke me up twice - the first time after I only had 5 hours of sleep - and the second after I had about 7 - total. Waking up angry is so awful - so totally awful. I told my manager that I named him Johnny Rocket and he said he wants to be Wolfgang. So I know Wolfgang would say something to creepy pants (who doesn't even deserve to have capitalization) but I don't think it will do any good. I don't have the right attitude and why am I focusing all my energy on this?? BECAUSE IT'S MY JOB and I deserve to make money. Ugh - I made plenty of money - enough money and I can work tonight and hopefully have enough till Thursday. Okay - I have enough till Thursday. I need to focus on something else. I need to get my writing done - I need to focus on my art and I need to focus on what I want. I have to get positive and look at what I want. Move towards good. Move towards health. I can take care of myself this week for sure. I can start swimming and go to therapy and write and go to meetings. I can also do some drawings and love love LOVE BIG. Turn this anger into love. Okay - I have to get ready for work. Love. I'm focusing on love. Please love. Wonder Love. Yes. I sound crazy. Crazy with LOVE!!! Oh boy.