Writing Real Quick

It's Sunday and I am here in my office while the guy runs to the store real quick.  I had a nice day....did some yoga and stretching, then jogged a bit on the treadmill.  Grocery shopped at Whole Foods and Shoprite and then came home and cooked.  I love cooking on Sundays.  I made some sweet potato chunks in the over with onion and fresh rosemary, baked regular potatoes, chicken with organic garlic and organic chipotle, a spinach salad with pepitas, roasted almonds, red onion and a homemade tahini dressing.  I tried to make the sweet potatoes like the ones I ate at Organic Kitchen in the East Village.  They came out really good but I think I used to much olive oil.  They were a bit drier at Organic Kitchen.  Then we had dinner and went to alanon.  Is that fucking exciting or what?  Ha - it felt good and healthy.  I have an audition tomorrow and I am super tired but I think after a good night's sleep it will be okay.  Have you ever had a Lilly bar??  I am eating one right now.  They are chocolate bars sweetened with Stevia and they are amazing.  Not too sweet - so so good.  In fact this one is kind stale but it's still amazing!  No weird after taste - just GOOD.  I had diarrhea all morning - holy mother of God it was awful.  No clue why. The perjeta still maybe?  It's so scary - makes me so nervous I am sick still.  I just am not sure.  Or am I?  I don't know.  I don't feel as tired and awful as I did before I found out about the cancer but I am still so tired.  I also drink gallons less coffee.  Well anyway I just keep trying to take care of myself - inside and out.  Be kind to my mind....rest, exercise, eat well - write in my journal - be honest, be kind to others but not be a doormat.  Grow.  I am trying to let myself grow and HEAL.  Have balance.  Self-esteem.  Personal power.  Yeah so anyway that is how I am moving forward and - and I don't know what.....living I guess.  It might be a little boring but it's also profound and amazing.  I have shows and auditions and stuff to keep my life exciting - my home life and everything in between can be this.  And that's fucking fabulous.  Byeeeee - eat a Lilly bar!