Finally grateful after a long day of misery.

Do you know I had a hard day - I mean so what?  I just felt CRAZY.  I had wicked pms (I still do but I walked and walked and walked and I feel so much better).  Also - whatever I just had a hard day.  Then I kept telling myself it would change and it did.  I took phone calls and went to a meeting - went to my rehearsal after work.  I think a huge part of it is having withdrawal from the waitressing.  It's like when I moved in here and I felt so completely fucking crazy - not being at the bed and breakfast.  I mean I really felt like I was going through withdrawals this morning.  No psycho weekend - no instant cash - no drama to heal from or blame my craziness on.  Yeesh.  Then I finally got home and took some vitamins and felt so grateful to be here - to have this apartment to come home to.  I ate some hummus - put on pajamas - holy fuck - are you kidding me - that's amazing.  I really was freaking out about the guy a little bit also - but it didn't make sense so I just didn't call him - told myself everything would shift and change and it did.  Now I am so completely exhausted.  Someone actually asked me to work for them this weekend at that restaurant!!  I told them I don't work there anymore and then they told me to go fuck myself.  What even is that??  Can someone even do that?  Well I guess so.  I'm worried about money - of course.  But I am okay.  Big sigh.  Okay love you Bluebie bye!!  ps Can you even believe how long it has taken for me to stop waitressing?