Lovely days, sad funeral, crazy Grandpa.

We had the funeral for the dog.  My sister picked flowers for her and my father had his farm hand dig a hole where a bunch of the other pets are buried by a lovely stone wall.  We then went to lunch and when we came back the farm hand had filled in the hoe, smashed the flowers and thrown them over the wall and a chicken laid an egg on top of the grave.  He doesn't speak English so much and my father said he told him to put MORE flowers on top of the grave and instead he just took the shovel and smashed the flowers my sister picked, scooped them up and threw them over the wall.  Nobody saw the chicken lay the egg but it sure did it.  It might have been a Guinea Hen because they lay their eggs in weird places.  My Grandpa is saying that my dead Grandma has been coming back to visit - but only during the day.  SO - so he's fine right?  I had such a lovely trip with my family and I got to see friends and go to meetings and COME ON - this is a MIRACLE right?  I still couldn't even take showers everyday 2 years ago - or even get to work without getting into a cab.  Now I can't pay my rent but I FEEL SO MUCH BETTER AND I TAKE SHOWERS.  Ugh - I'm joking.  I can't pay my rent but it will happen.  I brought back flowers from the farm and plant cuttings and I was so sad to leave my sister and all the fresh air and sunshine.  I feel very blessed and it makes me so nervous to say that but I do.  I - what?  I forgot what I was going to say.  I had to take a shower right after the dog funeral and then I cried in there for 20 minutes.  I actually had to get on my hands and knees in the shower and pray - it hut too much.  But now I can visit her - and my cat, the other cat, the dogs and that egg the chicken left.  I'm boiling eggs I have to go.  I love you my Bluebie Blueb.