Just woke up and

somehow I woke up okay after that - show last night.  there was also a man there rolled up in a carpet that you could stand on.  I did it but I didn't like it.  I didn't like it at all.  It felt like I was standing on a jelly fish.  I got myself all together before I went to bed last night - got ready, put on clean pajamas, changed my sheets into fresh clean sheets, did a little bit of yoga.  Now I've made coffee and I'm about to pray & meditate.  It was how my old life was - those crazy shows - that band with my ex-husband.  Okay - really huge painful lesson learned.  My acting class is starting again soon and I really want to do that - that and other things I've never done - make movies -play more music only for real.  I'm going to take lessons for that too.  Okay - I need to be at work early to work a pre-show.  I talked to my friend about getting another job and hopefully - I talked to 2 friends actually.  Time to move on - that's all there is to it - it's time to move on all around.  I'm just not sure what I am meant to be doing?  How am I helping the world?  I really don't know - I am really confused about that - for sure.  Well okay - I have to get my shit together - bye my Bluebie Blueb - I do love you.