Oops.

Haha - I wrote a whole post and I started to clean something off the keyboard and it all deleted. I said oops because I went to a website I know will upset me. I felt SO sick as I was going to it and it did indeed upset me and I'm now done. I do not need to go look at these things and all I can think of is if I felt that bad doing that how awful would drinking or drugging be? Ugh - not to mention there is NO WAY I couldn't recognize that sick feeling in my stomach. Awful. Holy shit. I don't want to write anymore about it. How awful. It really hurt me. I think I'm weak from working a loose program this week. Jeeeez louiiiiissse. Holy cow. I want a clean life and that is so not clean. I will fell better tomorrow I hope. I'm going to pray and meditate now for the second time today. Yoga before bed too. Awwwww - it's okay - it will be okay. Please keep my heart open and light. Help me Lord to be kind to myself and stay on my path. Blueberry I love You!!!