I HAD A REALIZATION!!!!!!

Hahahaaa - oh my GOD and it's probably the same one I have had 50 times.  I got my ass out of bed today, prayed and meditatedish (I was having way trouble with that today) and got ready and got out the door early enough to go pick up my check from the new job and to the store - EARLY.  Then I got right to work finishing everything from yesterday and I sent Tawnie Looner a message asking her to send my pay stubs to my house since they always go to her.  I'm so embarrassed to say I was just afraid to ask for them.  She pays me direct deposit and I have no idea why she gets them but - well I just sort of tapped out of taking responsibility for that.  But today - I took the responsibility and then - ugh - whatever.  I was on time and it occurred to me that I would have probably been late today and I would have left already to go to the bank and blah, blah, blah.  MY REAL POINT (HERE WE GOOO!!!) is that if I were doing my job correctly and not fucking off then maybe I wouldn't have gotten so overly sensitive to her yesterday.  I mean did I really expect heaps of praise because I'm doing my job for once?  Or for that matter - was I really expecting her to be BALANCED - EVER?  So - SO LOOK HOW MUCH I HAVE GROWN.  Ugh - I need to get my period stat.  Hahaha - byeeeeeee.