Even though I did something to take care of myself -

by asking her to let me leave at 6:00 today - I then had a totally hard time taking care of myself in every other way. It's like I have only a teeny tiny little amount of self-care in my self-care bank and I used it all up by asking for what I needed. By asking for not only what I needed but what I had originally agreed to when working this job. the I didn't drink enough water yesterday blah, blah blah. Okay - holy fuck - I feel like I'm newly getting sober again - so crazy. I almost have 2 years - I just need to hang in there and get to meetings. I already don't want to go to one tonight. OH MY GOD THIS IS SO HARD!! Okay - it's okay - it's really okay and I will really get to a meeting and I have water. Okay. Bye for now. It's so slow today it's crazy.