Omg I am so fucking tired.

Shows, costume fittings, working both jobs (till this one ends), spending time with the guy and trying to fix everything here for me leaving.  What the fuck I am so tired.  so tired and SO GRATEFUL.  I fucked up today time-wise but well - it's okay!  Everyone makes mistakes and I certainly learned from it - BIG time.  Am I making any sense?  Im not going to be able to write on my blog at the other job!  I wont even be able to be on the computer!!  Holy shit it's like a real job.  Well I am going to enjoy being able to sit down and be online while I am here haha.  Ah it's so wonderful - life is shifting - I feel so very grateful and so grateful that it's happening in a kind way.  Im just trying so hard to be nice to myself.  Im really trying to kindly shift myself away from the negative thinking once it starts.  I mean I can't help it starting (supposedly)  BUT I can help it from continuing and I can be nice to myself about the whole thing.  So how's that for some mother-fucking recovery??  Im crying a little bit but I think it's fake crying because my nose is tickling itself - that's when I always know Im crying fake tears.  Oh good LORD - okay well I somehow managed to get to work on time today, go to a costume fitting and get back here - so now I just need to sell some stuff and organize my whole life.  Haha.  Right.  I LOVE YOU BLUEBIE!!!!  Bye.