I'm being a victim.

That's all - I'm being a victim of the life I am wanting to live.  I'm so lucky I'm sober - I have a beautiful man in my life and I know wonderful people.  I also believe that I'm sad that this show and my idea around how to get people to it - was manipulative and - I don't know - similar to how I used to live in the past but also - I need to ask some questions.  I know Im not being clear.  I need to live and create differently now that's all.  It's okay.  I prayed & meditated and my thoughts shifted.  It's okay - it's all just a challenge and I just need to take this opportunity to ask questions, have my power and be clear.  It's all good.  And even better I don't have to work with that crazy chick today haha so awesome.  Okay so let's make the best of this day and grab life loosely (but don't let goooooo) the horns and breathe.  Bye!