Shows, fear - need to leave the house, Just Sitting Here.

I have a show tonight - there's really no need to be very nervous except I'm trying to get a tape - not a tape - what do you call it now?  A video I guess - yes - a video.  I want to record my set so I can try to get on this TV show.  I need WORK.  I need paid work - I need to get - okay - whoa.  I want.  Who needs to be on TV?  I don't know - so I asked the guy if I could submit to him - he said yes and now I am terrified.  I asked another guy if I can do his show so I can get a tape for this and now I am terrified.  I almost destroyed my relationship earlier today because I'm so scared.  UGH.  There's really nothing at stake.  I can just do the show tonight and then if it's a good set - give it to the guy and he will like it or not.  That's it.  Jesus.  So I put on my make-up - got all ready - and now I am sitting here typing this.  I need a manicure and a pedicure for this weekend.  I'm going to his niece's wedding and then on Monday - his poor Mama's funeral.  SO CLEARLY I NEED A MANICURE.  Ugh - no seriously my toes look like the jagged edge of something - they are killing all my socks.  I can't seem to leave the house though because then I have to go to this show.  I need a meeting also.  CHRIST I'm scared.  This is like what?  I don't know but I have to go.  YIKES.  LOVE YOU BLUEBIE BYE.