Sick with tectonic shift happenings......

Oh boy - totally sick.  Green stuff coming out of my face and throat and I drank so much green tea yesterday I almost made myself sick.  What else?  Oh I slept 13 fucking hours.  When was the last time I did that??  And I mean I went to bed at 9 - so I slept a healthy 13 hours.  Holy shit.  I got up, prayed and meditated, listened to an alanon meeting and listened to an AA meeting - which helped so much it's unreal.  There is something going on with the alanon phone meetings where someone keeps unmuting and it's disrupting the meetings.  It's also fucking hilarious because they have their TV on in the background and it just sounds funny.  However it sucks and is really selfish.  It's probably a kid doing it.  Anyway I'm drinking more tea and sitting here resting and trying to get out of work tomorrow so I can really heal.  So I am taking care of myself.  I'm going to neti-pot myself and take a bath right now - then make myself some healthy food.  Oh boy - I almost threw up last  night and when I tell you how badly I did not want to do that - I don't know - I just sat there and prayed & prayed that I would not throw up.  I hate throwing up - it is horrifying.  So I didn't and I just remembered how that is all I did at the end of my drinking - I just threw up everyday - most mornings and often while I was drinking and often just right onto the floor.  So I feel really grateful I am just sick right now, I have the day off and I can take care of myself.  I listened to those phone meetings because I am willing to go to any length (except leave the house) to stay sober.  So what does that mean?  I shouldn't leave the house - it's 10 fucking degrees and I'm sick!!  Omg - I am so crazy.  I also keep turning it over that the super is smoking down there and it's bothering me - but what can I do?  I am praying that God shows me what he wants me to do about it.  Does that make me a pussy?  I mean I also pray that he dies but that's not really very spiritual is it?  So I am praying to be shown what to do.  Yeah.  Great.  So what is the tectonic shift?  I'm actually resting when I am sick and I am actually praying for an answer when doubtful.  Plus I don't know - something else but I can't put it into words because I have no idea what it is.  Do you know I never realized how much I talk to myself until I had to not talk to make my voice better??  SO MUCH!  All I do is talk to myself and look at myself in the mirror.  ESPECIALLY WHEN I CRY.  Weirdo.  Wonderful Weirdo!!  What?  Ew.  Time to steam myself - love you Bluebie bye.