Serious doubt right now.....

I mean about being able to stay on this schedule and grow.  I know I have to stay sober - that's it - that's the only thing I know.  How am I going to keep working at these jobs?  How in the world?  I also - my eyes feel like they are going to explode out of my head - they are so sore all the time - this whole glasses thing is such a pain in the ass.  I finally got some relief from a meeting tonight - finally.  I feel better after having gone to meetings 3 days in a row.  I'm just so tired and I can't seem to keep up on my self-care.  Okay - but not only that - hello - what was I going to complain about - not only that - but oh right - I'm not doing enough comedy.  I hosted an open mike last night - okay - fine.  And my acting class - with my beautiful acting teacher who only loves my talent.  What??  But - oh my dear Lord - I'm too tired to even write about this - I have to be up at 6:00 tomorrow morning.  Okay.  I have to get myself to bed right now and do my little bit of yoga and get ready for bed.  I just cleaned the humidifier and I was burning candles which is so nice to do after coming home from work - and I had tea.  So nice to have tea.  Okay - good night sweet Bluebie - let's have nice dreams.